Hello... it's me. (sorry I HAD to)

I just got out of the shower and I spent half of my time swirling around shampoo in the palm of my hand in circles and patterns. I was thinking about a lot of things while doing this. 

Right before I took a shower I watched a clip on Facebook (dang those "must know more" headlines). This video was a short piece composed of 15 second increments of one little girl. Her dad took random footage of her against the same backdrop every week of her life since a weeeee lil baby to age 14.He molded it all together and it was truly beautiful to watch. And I cried. 

So I'm swirling this shampoo in my hand thinking about this and how much my life has changed since I was a babe to now (20 years old). I've changed some and stayed the same some. My family and friends are different and some the same. I remember sitting in my high school bedroom thinking about how boys were dumb but how girls were the worst. I've had a boyfriend now for 4ish going on 5 years. But boys are still dumb and girls are still the worst. I've always stuck to who I was/am pretty strong my whole life. My values haven't changed. But the way I think has developed. I've grown a deeper understanding of others through my life experiences. Some of those experiences I wish I could relive forever and some that make me sad. I struggle with change. I crave it and want it and need it. But cry when my siblings grow up, when my cousin isn't close to me anymore, when I visit all the old streets I played on, and when I take a new step in the now adult life. But change is natural. I'm just overly sentimental. Or sometimes scared. 

In the shower I spread the(now)(nonexistent) bubbly blob over my veins and wrinkles in my hands. I couldn't help but think, "Humans are amazing". My body is so complex. Our minds are wired so uniquely. I know that we were sent here on this Earth to do GREAT things. There is much more to this life that I've lived so far. My story is just going to get bigger and scarier and greater. 

Anyways, shower thoughts. 

Back to the paper thats due tomorrow. 

nosleepclub

Brooke

p.s. hi old friend

i am tired and done and just want to lay in a pretty place by myself and think a lot

The weather here is a mystery. If Idaho's weather was a person, I'd like her. She would be fun. She would be pretty. She would not be ordinary. She would be cool. She would dress good too. 

miss this guy and this place

I want cool friends.

into it

here we go

superfastcatchup

senior year went by too fast

i turned 18

graduated in a blue gown

ryan took me to new york

got a puppy named hank

moved to a different house

my dad is going to school and quit his job

slept in the downstairs bedroom

soaked up as much of summer as i could

too many last times

too many goodbyes

ryan and i are still together

both got "most unique" in high school not on purpose

was going to go to college in utah

i'm in idaho instead 

i feel cool when i walk to and back from school

i walk fast

i still hate homework

but i still do it

my roommates are nice i guess

i don't feel old

my face still gets red when talking  

i am bored 

i want to meet new friends

the one dollar ice cream place is nice

it's already cold

it's September

SO

In a few months it will be a year since I last blogged on here. One. Whole. Year. 

I think I might be back. 

(Before Break) Thoughts on school:

Giggling girls that hug in front of staircases need to stop. Forever. No more.

The smell of sunscreen on the boy next to me in English was super strong.

The day I wore my yellow long sleeve shirt made me feel like a bird. The sleeves moved in the wind like crazy.

I hate it when I'm standing up by my desk and someone needs to get by and they squeeze past me facing the other direction. It makes our butts touch. I want to die of grossness. lfkvhierum... Gag.

These two girls sitting in front of me were playing with their candy cane wrappers a lot. it was distracting.

The same two girls talked about their dreams of being plastic surgeons. It was hilarious.

A guy with long hair in the hallway smelled JUST like confetti cake mix.

I'm surprised I still have arms. Everyday I play a game of Hallways vs. Brooke. The game consists of not getting bumped/pushed. I haven't won yet. I come to class with battle wounds. After winter break... ITS ON HALLWAY!!!

people 

in English i sit in front of a lonely girl that speaks in all caps. 

in math a guy across the room thinks he's hot shiz.

catchphrase

"thats soooo raven" 

"thats sooooo not raven"

Preparing To Surf In Russia from Ben Weiland on Vimeo.

Those men are the pants.

I need a dance partner.

& some short hair

+ some fun